confession 1편(part 1)

LINK: confession 1편 (part 1)

Currently listening to: There Goes My Baby – Usher

Bet you ain’t know that I be checking you out
When you be putting your heels on
I swear your body’s so perfect, baby
How you work it, baby yeah
I love the way that you be poking it out
Girl, give me something to feel on
So please believe we gone be twerking it out
By the end of the night, baby

I loathe going to the dentist.

I haven’t been since COVID, that’s six years ago. I know… it’s pretty bad.

I wasn’t always like this though. As a kid, my parents made me go religiously, at least twice a year. I had braces, retainers, and all that for several years too. I never had a single cavity and neither has my mom. My brother, on the other hand, had several (seven). He loves sweets a lot whereas I am a savory kinda gal.

But somewhere along the line, I stopped going back to the dentist. I think most of it had to do with a less than desirable experience and also having to shell out $600 for a mouthguard that I shredded in a month from my nighttime grinding. After that, I felt like the whole thing was racket. Dentists charging me up the yin yang for this and that and making me get that stupid ass custom mouthguard. Ugh.

A couple of years ago, I noticed a small cavity forming on the back of one of my molars. I could barely see it and it didn’t hurt… so I did nothing. I know this is very out-of-pocket for me because I am such an advocate for preventive care. As I told one of my colleagues about this, her mouth dropped and said that it was “not in my repertoire” which I acknowledged. I know, I’m not perfect. I have faults, I am human after all.

After reuniting with Lourdes and Lexi after several years, I asked Lourdes who her dentist was. She had gotten veneers and her teeth and gums looked amazing. She told me that she goes to Tijuana (TJ) because she has HMO dental insurance. Lexi, doesn’t have insurance at all, and tags along to get her cleanings down there too.

So I fessed up to them about my cavity, that I hadn’t established with a dentist in years, and I needed a support person to go with me. I’m a full grown adult, but fuck I hate the dentist so much.

Lourdes said I should go with her since the dentist is a family member and she does good work. And I trust Lourdes on this because for as long as I’ve known her, she’s had massive dental issues, one after another, infection after infection, and extraction after extraction. She’s gone to so many dentists that for her to vouch for this dentist carried some weight to it.

I had the day off, so I was at her place by 0630. We crossed the border and drove to TJ, and showed up an hour early. We killed time at a local cafe with coffee and a scone. It was nice to chill and relax before the torture begins.

When we got there, there were two female dentists. One spoke English fluently and the other did not. They could tell that I was following along with their conversation with Lourdes, so they asked me, “¿Habla Español?” I said, “poquito.” It’s my standard answer whenever people ask. I just like to see if I’m being treated different whether I speak Spanish or not, because I know Koreans treat people differently if they speak the language.

Then they moved on and was curious about my skin. They asked if I was wearing makeup, and I said “no”. Then they asked if they could touch my face. I nodded and then they asked what products I used. I shared with them that I’m using a bunch of Korean skincare lines and that next time I’d bring them some samples since I have plenty to share.

They took a CBCT scan of my grill to look at my teeth, jawbones, nerve pathways, and surrounding tissue. The good news: my teeth were nice and white, my gums were healthy, and I only needed a regular cleaning, not a deep cleaning or scaling. They were completely surprised. For the record, I use Philips Sonicare Diamondclean 9500 and floss with reach ultraclean at least twice a day. Toothpaste-wise, I use Crest 3D white brilliant mint whitening and Aquafresh action toothpaste extreme clean whitening. My mom swears by her waterpik, which I might have to look into one of these days.

The bad news: I had a cavity, which was no surprise… but I also needed a root canal.

OMG, I’ve never had a root canal before. And this was my first cavity. Ever. I asked if I really needed one and they pulled up the scan and showed me how deep it went and how close it was to the nerve. Again, they were surprised that I wasn’t having any pain but then again… I do have a high tolerance to pain. They told me that I could wait until it hurt and come back then, or get it done the following week, before it gets worse. Ugh.

Overall, it was a good experience. They were kind, highly competent, and comforting, which I really needed. Because of this, I went ahead and booked my root canal with the endodontist.

When I got home, I confessed to my mom that I haven’t gone to the dentist in six years, that I had a cavity, and required a root canal. She was disgusted and proceeded to tell me how irresponsible I was. And she’s right, I was. I can’t deny it but what’s done is done. Now I gotta go back for the root canal and a temporary crown.

The dentists quoted me about $800 U.S. for everything. My friend paid nearly $1,500 for the same thing but stateside, not including the cleaning, and still shelled out over $500 out of her own pocket because she spent over the allotted amount and our insurance only covered a certain percentage for some procedures. My insurance covers $1,500 a year, 90% of a root canal, and 50% of a crown. How is it that my premiums continue to climb but the coverage stays exactly the same?

Luckily, I have PPO insurance so I can get reimbursed and the dental office will submit the paperwork for me. Whatever the insurance doesn’t cover my HSA (health savings account) will… which means I could have money left over in case I need more work down the line.

I’m not looking forward to having this done but I can’t let it go on any longer. I’ll let y’all know how it goes… wish me luck…