LINK: take me with you
Currently listening to: LMLY – Jackson Wang
We keep on touchingBut we don’t feelFeels like you’re lettingYour hands off the wheel, aye
I’ve got a pretty wide age range of friends—some are Zoomers, Millennials, Gen X, and others are Boomers. I like it that way. I enjoy variety, and I like learning from people, whether they’re younger with freshy fresh perspectives or older with more life under their belt. Everyone brings something different to the table, and I value that.
My friends think that I lead some type of exciting life but I don’t feel like I do. In comparison to my friends like Five Star, my life is rather tame. I guess the thing is, I like to do things. Different things. I wish my activities were all planned, that would make my life a lot easier, but it’s not. There are events I find out about last minute that pique my interest and then before I know it, I’m already on my way there or buying a ticket to go.
Lately though, I’ve noticed a pattern: a lot of my friends lean heavily toward codependency. They want to do everything together: carpooling, eating out, seeing a movie, hitting up events… even errands. And while I love my friends, I’m perfectly fine doing things on my own. In fact, I often prefer it.
What gets me is the driving part. I don’t even like driving, but somehow I keep getting asked to be the driver. Not because I’m the designated driver or anything, it’s just because they hate traffic or they’re terrible drivers. Meanwhile, I’ve got astigmatism, so I’m not exactly thriving on the road either. That’s why I usually drive alone—less pressure, less worry. But they keep insisting.
I also made the rookie mistake of sending reels or TikToks to cool places I was casually considering for myself. Their immediate response? “When are we going?” Sigh. I wasn’t inviting anyone. I was just sharing something cool they might want to check out on their own, maybe with their family or other friends. But nope, now it’s assumed I’m organizing an outing. So I’ve stopped sending reels altogether.
And don’t even get me started on planning group hangouts. I hate it. I don’t want to research restaurants, figure out parking situations, or consider everyone’s budget and schedule. It’s too much. I don’t want to be responsible for other people’s enjoyment. I just want to go where I want, when I want, without the pressure of curating a good time for the group.
If I do want company, I’ll drop a message in the group chat like, “Hey, I’m going to this event. If you’re down, I’ll see you there.” That way, I move about freely, and anyone who really wants to join can meet me.
Are you the planner, turn up, boujie, thrifty, adventurous, laid-back, photo/videographer, or research friend? I’m the turn up, photo/videographer, most of the time laid-back kinda friend.
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