LINK: bad boys, whatcha gonna do when they come from you?
Currently listening to: Boom Boom Pow – The Black Eyed Peas
Electric shock, energy like a billion watts
Space be booming, the I like that boom boom pow
Them chickens jackin’ my style
They try to copy my swagger
I’m on that next shit now
I’m so 3008
You so 2000 and late
I got that boom, boom, boom
That future boom, boom, boom
Let me get it now pop
Galactic, call me Mr. Spock
We bumpin’ in your parking lot
Have you ever interacted with the police?
Prompt snagged from: NY Times
I’ve actually had a lot of interaction with law enforcement. Two of my cousins are cops (LAPD – Los Angeles and CPD – Chicago PD). On the other side of the spectrum, I’ve also been pulled over my fair share of times, mostly for speeding or having front window tint that was way too dark. Hehe, IYKYK. I used to have full blackout limo tint on every window except the windshield. Apparently, that’s a California no-no. Now, my front window tints are still dark but not blackout limo tint.
I’ve had patients who have arrived with U.S. Marshals, handcuffed to the gurney and ankles. They were inmates who needed medical attention and were transferred to our hospital. This happened quite often, to the point where I got used to them… the Marshals and the inmates.
I’ve worked closely with law enforcement in another previous job, which got me interested in forensics. Who knows? After I put in my 15 years at my current job (at which I can collect a pension upon retirement age), I might circle back to that career path.
Anyway, I digress.
Who even uses paper checks anymore, right? That’s what I thought too, until I realized I had three left in my checkbook that was collecting dust. I decided I might as well use them up. One of them went to pay a $62.54 utility bill. I filled it out, tucked it into an envelope, and dropped it in my mailbox the night before work.
A few days later, while doing my daily account checks, I noticed something amiss. A check had been cashed for nearly $1,000. I had a slight menty b at this moment. I pulled up the scanned image on my bank app and sure enough, the handwriting on the check was not mine. Someone had stolen my check, forged the signature, and changed the amount. What in the actual fuck.
Now, I’m mad because I have to take time out of my busy work schedule to deal with this fiasco. I called the bank immediately to report it. They advised me to contact the police and open a case since:
- stealing mail is a federal crime
- altering the check amount to over $950 made it grand theft
Within hours, my case was in the hands of an investigator. The detective was a sharp, no-nonsense woman. She explained that my check had been “washed”. Apparently, criminals use acetone to dissolve the original ink while keeping the paper intact. Once it’s dry, they rewrite the payee name and the amount as if it’s fresh from the checkbook. Mine had been made out to some rando dude.
Naturally, I called my cousin, who’s an attorney, to give him the rundown of my situation. He’s is such an empath, asked me if I was okay. I was fine, just… agitated. It’s a weird, having someone mess with my money. NGL, I did feel violated. He ran the guy’s name on the check for me and surprise, this numbnut had a rap sheet longer than a CVS receipt.
About a month later, the detective called again. They caught him. He’d been arrested, the check-cashing store turned over their security footage, and because ID is required for payout, there was no denying it was him.
I’d like to say I felt a rush of satisfaction, but I wasn’t. I was still very irritated about all this. I was annoyed that this guy had been in and out of the system for who k nows how long. Annoyed that I even had to deal with this mess because I wanted to use the last of my checks. But at least he wasn’t out on bail this time.
Then came the letter from the District Attorney’s office. It was about Victims’ Rights, including the offer of a victim advocate for emotional support. I hadn’t thought of myself as a “victim” per say but in a way I guess thats what I was on paper.
I was annoyed that this situation even happened. Annoyed at myself for writing the check and annoyed that what’s his balls even existed and complicated my life.
Life moved on. Work got intense because… COVID and I didn’t bother to check on the case outcome. Nine months later, another letter arrived. This fool was out. Released. Just like that.
I know there are bigger crimes and worse criminals out there, but it didn’t stop me from feeling a certain way. This guy would probably go right back to this revolving-door routine. The system spits him out, he does something stupid again, and the cycle continues.
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