I’ve always been the type of person who keeps their financial business private. I never ask men about their income, mainly because I believe it’s their personal business. To be honest, I couldn’t care less how much someone makes. It’s irrelevant to me unless it affects the dynamic between us, and even then, I’m not inclined to pry. But what really gets under my skin is when men ask me how much money I make. I’m always taken aback, but my go-to response is usually something like, “It’s enough for me.”
Then, of course, they’ll ask, “Is it more than me?” And I just smile and say, “Maybe? Honestly, I don’t know how much you make, nor do I care.” But the curiosity lingers, and they’ll go ahead and share their salary anyway, often with an unspoken desire for comparison. I feel a strange sense of obligation to either confirm or deny their question, which seems to open up a Pandora’s box. If I say no, there’s this wave of relief that passes over them, like they’re somehow validated. But when I say yes, it’s as though I’ve just drained the very essence of their masculinity. The air changes, and suddenly they become more… fragile.
It reminds me of something from my childhood. There was a time when my mom was making more money than my dad, and it clearly affected him in ways I didn’t understand at the time. He would make little snide comments, but it wasn’t until I got older that my mother pointed out the tension. It became clear that his pride was wounded, and he wasn’t really comfortable with her earning more. When the situation reversed and my dad made more money than my mom, it was like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. He seemed much happier and more confident, which just goes to show how much of an impact these things can have on someone’s sense of self-worth.
The whole money dynamic can be so tricky, especially when there are unspoken expectations or insecurities tied to it. How do you deal with it?
I had put a warning for NSFW (not safe for work) because of the sexual video content.
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