bend it like Beckham

Currently listening to: STAY – The Kid Laroi feat. Justin Bieber

When I’m away from you, I miss your touch (ooh)
You’re the reason I believe in love
It’s been difficult for me to trust (ooh)
And I’m afraid that I’ma fuck it up
Ain’t no way that I can leave you stranded
‘Cause you ain’t ever left me empty-handed
And you know that I know that I can’t live without you
So, baby, stay

I was reading a post from Darryl’s blog a while back and something he wrote really stuck with me: “Know the rules so you can bend them.” That just hit different. It made me realize—consciously or not—that’s how I seem to be.

I’m not a rebel without a cause. I’m strategic. I like knowing the structure, the fine print, the back doors—because when I understand how it all works, I can find the gaps. The creative solutions. The loopholes that can help people when the system doesn’t. I’m constantly asking “What if?” What if I tried it this way? What if this roadblock wasn’t the end, but just an invitation to reroute?

Work tells me to hurry up and get to the next patient but when a patient can’t afford their copay, I can’t just accept that. I look further into it. Is there a manufacturer’s program? Can I use GoodRx, SingleCare, or BuzzRx to cut down the cost? Is Walmart or Costco a better option? (Some people don’t even know you don’t need a Costco membership to fill prescriptions there.) Because at the end of the day, if they can’t access the medication, they can’t stay compliant—and that’s setting them up to fail. Luckily, I don’t get in too much trouble for the extra minutes I spend with the patients because I type fast so it usually offsets the time.

At another one of my jobs, leadership has come to trust that I can grasp complex concepts quickly. They often come to me with a problem and say, plainly, “Fix it.” No long explanation, no hand-holding—just trust that I’ll figure it out.

I read fairly fast, which helps me scan through policies, contracts, and procedures. But it’s not just about speed—it’s about reading between the lines. My outlook e-mails are my receipts from things that have been documented years ago about XYZ.

I build a case—document everything, lay out the logic, show the blueprint of my workaround. Then I present it. Leadership usually forwards it to the legal team, and more often than not, it holds up. Not because I’m cutting corners, but because I’m willing to zoom out, reframe the problem, and propose a smarter path. I’m sure the legal department is tired of my ass but IDGAF.

Then there were the times when my parents prohibited me from going out. But… they never technically said I couldn’t bring anyone in. So I played by the letter, not the spirit, of the rule. I would often sneak my then-boyfriend into the house late at night, every creaky floorboard and door hinge giving us a mini heart attack. We’d spend hours in my room, whispering in the dark, laughing under our breath, making out and cuddling under the blankets, and our hearts pounding with the thrill of getting away with it. NGL, it was exhilarating.