quiet dinner

Currently listening to: guilty as sin – Taylor Swift

I keep these longings locked
In lowercase inside a vault
Someone told me
There’s no such thing as bad thoughts
Only your actions talk
These fatal fantasies
Giving way to labored breath
Taking all of me
We’ve already done it in my head
If it’s make believe
Why does it feel like a vow
We’ll both uphold somehow?

Before I blocked Zaddy, he asked me if I would like to have a quiet dinner with him.

Obviously, I immediately wanted to say, “yes” but I took my time in responding back and said that I was busy for the next couple of months. This was not a lie. I was working mandatory overtime, averaging between 70-80 hours a week and as much as I wanted to dine with him again, I couldn’t find a way to expand my bandwidth.

We both know what that intimate quiet dinner would entail. This is him being coy with me and luring me in with his seductive looks…whispering sweet nothings into my ear, and touching my leg ever so lightly. Us getting one too many drinks, with me stumbling all over the place, and him catching me.

One look and it would wreck us all.