the unprecedented new normal

Currently listening to: drivers license – Olivia Rodrigo

I know we weren’t perfect but I’ve never felt this way for no one
And I just can’t imagine how you could be so okay now that I’m gone
‘Cause you didn’t mean what you wrote in that song about me
‘Cause you said forever, now I drive alone past your street

COVID-19.
The Corona Virus.
SARs COV-2 virus.
코로나.

I watched it spread throughout the world thinking that it wouldn’t happen in the U.S.  but I was sorely mistaken.  While I was working, we ran out of N-95 masks and ventilators.  We had makeshift rooms in the parking structures.  Staff were holed up in hotel rooms so they wouldn’t have the potential to bring home the disease and to keep their families safe. 

I was on high alert and became a light sleeper in the event that work called and said that they needed to send me to the respiratory unit due to staffing needs.  Friends donating their 3M N-95 masks, many of them mailed them to me from all over the country because I was in dire need.  Whatever extra supplies (PPE – gloves, face shields and safety glasses) I had, I shared with my colleagues who were deployed to other departments. I watched my coworkers get burnt out crispy, develop PTSD or panic disorders, leave healthcare altogether, and a few had even passed away. RIP. 

Friends texting me to stay strong, that they were praying for me, and making sure that I was still alive.  The media and organizations calling their front line employees heroes.  Not all heroes wear capes…we’re all in this together.

I remember work issuing us these stickers (stating that we were front line workers) to put on our badge, in the event that I was pulled over by the police when were were under stay at home orders, while on my way to work.  Getting our temperatures checked whenever we entered any building.  Using hand sanitizers, wipes, or washing my hand whenever I touched anything.  Giving people glaring looks if they coughed in my general direction.

Costco selling out of toilet paper…again.  Lining up to go to stores and keeping six feet away, social distancing.  Kids and parents forced to work from home.  Zoom meetings, “Can you hear me?  Can you see my screen?  You’re on fucking mute.”  We were glued watching Fauci, Cuomo, and Cardi B.  Olivia Rodrigo blew up at the peak of the pandemic.  Everyone was walking or going outdoors because they got cabin fever.  People were getting dogs…bikes…roller skates.  Instacart everything and order whatever on Amazon.  TikTok dance challenges.  Binging Tiger King on Netflix.  The telehealth explosion.  I never learned how to make sourdough bread but I did buy many loaves from a woman who was selling them from her home, after her and her husband were laid off, who now owns a thriving bread store.  Dining al fresco was also a fav of mine.

Initially, we were mandated to take ten days off from work if we got the vid which was later reduced to five days, and then because staffing was obliterated…it was only if you had symptoms you were to quarantine.  Every day, we were given the statistics of how many patients were + with the vid, how many were hospitalized, and in which departments.  Uptick…tick…tick…boom.  The numbers were staggering and we all wanted to cry.  We wondered when this devastation would end.  

What a wild time it was…I still can’t believe it happened.  Bruh, NGL but TBH, I was traumatized by everything that I saw.  And to add to that, I was also attending grad school during this time. The stress was insurmountable.  My hair was falling out.  My skin looked horrible.  I was either not eating or eating like shit and I didn’t care.  It was definitely a whirlwind of emotions.