Are you holding a grudge? About?
In the mix: Bad Blood – Taylor Swift Feat. Kendrick Lamar
Did you have to do this?I was thinking that you could be trustedDid you have to ruinWhat was shining? Now it’s all rustedDid you have to hit meWhere I’m weak? Baby, I couldn’t breatheAnd rub it in so deepSalt in the wound like you’re laughing right at me
Currently, I don’t hold any grudges. What’s in the past is in the past. It’s not going to change so why waste my energy on that?
But if you were to ask me a few years ago, I would say that I held a grudge against my colleagues for months. At one point, we were all friends but for whatever reason (I still don’t know why) there was a falling out. They became the most horrific bullies and would torment me and my other coworkers. It’s as if they woke up every morning and chose violence.
It was definitely giving mean girl vibes. They would pour yogurt on our cars while it was baking outside from the heat, put dead cockroaches in coffee mugs, plant pregnancy tests in the waste baskets to stir up drama, and of course talk shit about us on the daily. A coworker had a tire slashed at work. We knew it was them because we could hear their cackling and proudly boasting about what they did.
I turned in my resignation letter to the director and she leaked it to everyone else that I was leaving. The last two weeks seemed like an eternity. The mean girls were even more ratchet than ever and things were escalating quickly They were threatening violence, often times they would scream at us about the most minute thing, or sabotage our work. Where’d my stethoscope or pen go? “God, she smells like kimchi. It stinks so bad.” I had to lock up everything or carry it with me at all times. I couldn’t leave anything at my work station unattended. I barely held on to my sanity during that time. I knew there was a light at the end of the tunnel so I just kept on going. I don’t know how I made it but I did.
When I started my new job, I felt like I had PTSD. I was constantly watching my back, heart was racing, and rapid breathing whenever someone was talking to me. If I heard footsteps behind me, I was quick to turn around. Whenever I heard whispering and laughing, I automatically assumed it was about me. Those bitches really fucked up my aura.
Three months in, I was more relaxed feeling as though I was in my element. There were new positions posted in the organization. I quickly told my coworkers from my previous employer and before I knew it, half of the clinical department was transferring to where I was working. I was told that my former director was cursing out my name down the hallway and crying bloody murder for months.
Now we got problems
And I don’t think we can solve ’em
You made a really deep cut
And baby, now we got bad blood
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